Hope at 30

If this is what my options are at 30....I welcome the aging process lol.  Essence magazine reported that with according to a new survey, you only have a 20% chance (without help, of getting pregnant with each act of sex. So I guess I'm screwed.  Cant see myself making much progress in 4 years. LMAO....thats really not funny...

Rusty Start

Well today has gotten off to a rocky start. 

• It's that time of the month again and I am emotional :(
• I broke my car-again
• I'm broke-again lol
• I'm sad about my lack of photography progress

I went out yesterday to another artist event and it was really big.  It was a lot of people there and a lot of photo opportunities too.  I took my camera with me so that I could take pictures of the guy that invited me out (the cute poet that I met the other night) and it was disappointing because I literally forgot how to work my camera - settings and all.  I'm way too rusty.  And because I am emotional right now, I really let that get me down.  He wants me to come out and take pictures of his video shoot tomorrow but I just don't think I can deliver - I really don't.  So I'm just going to go for support.  It really bothers me though that I have these opportunities that I can't even take advantage of.  Its really hard for me to find people to take pictures of in this city when I need practice.  So when someone actually asks me to take pictures of them, its great. But then I can't do anything with the 'greatness' because I'm so rusty.  -sigh- . And then a friend of mine posted on Facebook that he just invested 2K into his photo equipment game. Why don't I have that type of commitment?  Do I not want this?  I KNOW that I am in love with photography-so so so in love with photography.  It is the only thing that I love, honestly.  And its the only thing that I really want to do.  I could spend my whole life taking pictures.  I have this huge vision of using photography as a way to bring awareness to the issues that our race faces and using that awareness to initialize change and empowerment.  It just hurts every part of me not to take pictures...it really does.  It's worse than any heartbreak. God...I feel like crying...I can't wait until this 'monthly visit' is over. UGH

MP 2

I think I found a new recipe for me to cook this week.  It is broccoli chicken divan.  This one is going to take a while because so many people have recommended their own special touches that apparently get raving reviews because this one is too bland as is.  So I want mine to be just as delicious!

Ingredients

• 1 pound chopped fresh broccoli
• 1 1/2 cups cubed, cooked chicken meat
• 1 (10.75 ounce) can condensed cream of broccoli soup
• 1/3 cup milk
• 1/2 cup shredded Cheddar cheese
• 1 tablespoon butter, melted
• 2 tablespoons dried bread crumbs

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 450 degrees F (230 degrees C).
2. Place the broccoli in a saucepan with enough water to cover. Bring to a boil, and cook 5 minutes, or until tender. Drain.
3. Place the cooked broccoli in a 9 inch pie plate. Top with the chicken. In a bowl, mix the soup and milk, and pour over the chicken. Sprinkle with Cheddar cheese. Mix the melted butter with the bread crumbs, and sprinkle over the cheese.
4. Bake in the preheated oven for 15 minutes, or until bubbly and lightly brown.