I don't recall ever mentioning this guy in any of my posts but I'll call him Mr.BS because he is full of shit. I know that I talk to a lot of guys off and on-clearly there is no consistency or stability in my dating diet. So lets not act surprised by this random mention of a guy that has not been formally introduced until now.
Mr.BS has been around for going on 2 years. Hes young, a liar, and unreliable. As much as I hate him, I care for him just as much. I keep trying to block out all of his positives so that I can let his negatives be what breaks me away from him. But whenever I try to do this, I cant stop picturing stupid stuff like his smile...or his laugh...the way he rushed to my house without hesitation to help me study for my Accounting test...the way he holds on to me when he's telling me all of the things he loves about me...and the way he says "I love you"...the way my mom likes him and how he blends in with my family when meeting them...how when he kisses me I end up forgetting how much I hate him...how he understands everything my perspectives...the way that he can tolerate my attitude...how I can yell at him and it does not affect him. I love the way that he loves me.
How does this relate to my aggravation?
Mr.BS doesn't know what he wants-he says what he wants but then doesn't follow through. I cant keep dealing with him. He is so inconsistent with his actions and so unreliable. But for some reason...life without him just seems so boring and so dry. He brings excitement into my day...my life...and I would love to spend the rest of my life with his spirit. But there is no way that I can keep tolerating his BS.
I have tried to move on.
But if the guy that I am moving on with cant bring the same energy...I find myself falling in love with Mr.BS all over again.
