Brooklynn Hiding From Bootz

Safety at the Job

Ugh..I came across this while walking from the parking lot to my job. F'n gross.

Reflecting On A Good Dad

I miss my dad. I remember when I was younger, he used to try everything in his power to teach me everything possible.  One minute he had me cleaning the house like I owned it, mowing the lawn, picking up those ugly brown spike balls fallen from the 'big tree, and raking up leaves (and other peoples lawn for my own extra cash).  The next minute he had me cooking, taking sewing classes, learning how to write checks and budget money with tithing percentages to both church, myself and the bank.  When time permitted, he had me playing basketball on a team, enrolled in gymnastics, and swimming.  I was all over the place.  That's probably why I am so indecisive now. But one thing that I can say is that he was always there to witness every moment with each of these activities.  I really didn't understand how awesome he was for that until now.  I look at these guys that I talk to and they look like crap compared to my dad.  They think they are doing something great by spending time with their kids and buying them clothes or shoes...as if their kids only require material things and 'quality time' to grow up well-rounded and healthy.  There is no way that they could do what my dad did - hell, they can't do much for themselves.  I honestly feel sorry for many of their kids because they will miss out on so much...

Its Been A While

I'm so extremely tired right now. 
It feels like this week has been moving so fast and I can barely keep up.  And even still, it's not over just yet.
I'm headed home this weekend for the babyshower of one of my closest friends and wont be back to Chicago until Sunday morning.  It will be so good to see her but as always, I will be anxious to be back in the comforts of my new city (I ran away from Saint Louis for a reason, you know? Going back is never on the top of my list).

This whole week has been nothing but me focusing on my job - grinding as hard as possible.  I've been doing everything I can to get better and its been working.  They even offered me the opportunity to work on a newsletter for my region which is awesome because that's what I want to do for the company anyway - Marking/PR/Recruiting.  I have my first meeting in a few hours. Yay! I feel kind of bad that I don't feel like talking much about my personal life right now - I guess I'm not feeling it.  Some thing have happened that would be interesting to read but its just not important to me anymore, you know? I care more about other things "this month" lol.  Maybe that will change...or maybe it won't (hopefully). 

I was watching my stomach grow this morning and was depressed about it until I realized that Aunt Flo is almost here and I'm just bloated.  I was about to be pissed.  I really have to reevaluate whether or not I'm going to keep this gym membership - I went ONE TIME this whole month. I know I NEED to go but I don't FEEL like it. What can I say, I'm lazy.

Changes

I thought it was about time for a change so I switched things up a bit with the blog design.  Maybe now I will feel inspired to write again. Stay tuned...<3

sample from my 1st wedding

Yesterday

uggggh....got drunk...i feel like blah

I'm So Healthy :)

Whew and Wow

Oh man...this weekend was exhausting. The wedding turned out great and I got some excellent shots of the wedding from beginning to end. I cant wait to create the wedding album for them.  I think I'm going to make one for myself to serve as a wedding sample.  My mentor told me that with the quality photos that I did, even with the lack of equipment, I should have charged $7-800 for the shoot alone.  Not to mention the cost of post processing the photos, creating an album/picture delivery.  Excited! Obviously I didn't capitalize this time on what I could have charged but now I know for next time that I can make some money and that I am CAPABLE of doing this.  Apparently I can take a month to prepare wedding pics and that's great because I have way too much to work with and don't want to rush.  I also established an hourly rate for showcases which I will be doing a lot of after my recent event. 

I miss DJ today...haven't heard from him since that last message he sent me about missing me and I honestly haven't thought about him much since then. Don't know why he is on my mind now but I think I miss his cute face and his calmness.  Weird things have been happening with my "personal" life lately.

1. Two guys who aren't black actually have been showing me some interest - most people know that I've been anticipating some interracial attention for some years now. lol!
 2. An old friend that I never thought would be interested in me just asked that we start talking more to see if we can make our relationship more than what it is. Um...no...
3. A guy that I used to be crazy about in St.Louis (who was too busy to even look at me) confessed this weekend that he's been keeping tabs on me (and proved it).  He claimed that he has been thinking about me on a "beyond friendship" level and is ready for a commitment when he finds the right woman. I call bulls**t

And honestly could care less right now.  I don't know why...I guess I'm just bored with the repeat disappointment.  Not even trying to set myself up for failure right now...best to focus on the money.

OMG Breathe!

This week has been so crazy. Photos after photos.  Networking opportunities and exposure went out the roof with this last event (some pics below). I've been getting a lot of much and props.  I am officially charging and doing my first wedding tomorrow. Super excited.  I gotta get things ready for that today-not to mention handle my own crap. I decided that I am going to have to charge in order for me to afford the equipment needed to get the job done right.  See some shots below while I go get ready for my day!  Oh yeah, Kirko Bangz is SEXY! lol.

Good Lunches!

 

Lunch yesterday was fabulous.  I made chicken wraps with grilled chicken (I seasoned the heck out of it too).  My coworker told me that I should get reduced fat cheese next time and my mom said to cook the chicken in the pan that has holes so the grease drains.

Eh...

I'm lonely today.  I think I'll head to the bar and grill and pick up some random guy for bar conversation.  I deserve some spinach and artichoke dip anyway...I won't even bother changing out of my work clothes.

Is It Worth It?

I was on Facebook this morning and saw this guy's status to his wife.  It said:

"I'm so in love with you!!! Even when you're mad at me." 

They have been together for such a long time that I don't doubt him at all.  I'm sure she knows it too.  A lot of people take that for granted, you know? As if finding someone who will love you unconditionally is an easy thing to do.  Its not.  Think about how many bad habits that you have, or your way of life even.  How many friends have you had disappear on you or choose to leave you because they just cant "get with your program." Think about how many fights you've had with a friend that led to the end of your friendship...or how many boyfriends/girlfriends that broke up with you (or vice versa) because you two just couldn't make it work with all of your differences.

A lot of people feel as if they aren't ready to be in a serious relationship.  They have 'time' as they put it to play around and kick it until they are ready to settle down.  But time doesn't guarantee repeat luck. When you find someone that you have chemistry with...someone who is capable of loving you like that...is it really a good idea to let that rare unconditional love go and chance it at finding that type of love and friendship again?

Whats Wrong?

I need to learn to find contentment with myself...something isn't right about how I am feeling right now.